Eye Noir offers a compelling mix of delicate slab climbing and unexpected challenges in the heart of Yosemite National Park’s Lower Merced River Canyon. This three-pitch route unfolds over 510 feet of friction slab and technical face climbing, demanding focus and precision from start to finish. Beginning on a glassy slab accented by a subtle 1-inch crack for gear, the first pitch sets a thoughtful tone. As you ascend, the rock tension eases slightly but the runout spacing keeps you alert, giving full value to every well-placed bolt and cam.

By pitch two, the climbing moves across bolted slabs with a rhythm that teases confidence, yet keeps the margin slim. The bolts shine bright, owning their role as anchors where protection is key, but more than a few sections stretch the rope’s patience. The final stretch on pitch three brings climbers into a dark, rounded recess known locally as "the eye," a cool geological feature that stands in contrast to the sunlit slabs below. Beyond this pocket, the rock’s character shifts. Positive edges gradually yield to patches slick with a thick layering of guano, a gritty and somewhat unsettling presence left by local bats and birds. This coating covers footholds and handholds alike, forcing a cautious, deliberate finish some 15 feet above the last bolt.

The belay stance here is engulfed in the same grime, reminding you of the wildness that shares this vertical space with adventurers. A large flake overhead, the source of the residue, often erupts in evening noise from the local wildlife, blending nature’s soundtrack with the human endeavor. Bringing a brush or preparing to rappel for cleanup after pitch two is highly recommended for those seeking cleaner holds and a safer ascent. Despite this quirk, the climb’s overall integrity is solid, with recent maintenance and shiny new bolts providing confidence in the protection. The multi-pitch nature combined with slab and face climbing techniques makes Eye Noir an engaging test for sport climbers craving variety without leaving Yosemite’s classic walls.

Access to the route is straightforward once you locate The Cookie Sheet area within the sprawling Lower Merced River Canyon. It rises above Yosemite Valley, offering stunning views of the surrounding granite cliffs and river bends. The climb is best approached during the spring and fall when temperatures moderate, as the slab’s slickness can increase with moisture in colder or wetter seasons. Warm, dry afternoons bring the rock to ideal friction levels, but be prepared for bird activity during sunset hours.

Eye Noir’s 5.9 PG13 rating reflects modest technical difficulty but emphasizes the mental challenge posed by its exposure and variable protection. The runouts are balanced by secure bolts where it counts, with the sticky slab requiring precise footwork. Climbers should plan for a full day, bringing two 60m ropes due to the length of pitches two and three. Descending is best completed via well-equipped rap rings, simplifying the retreat after a climb that tests composure and movement equally.

This route invites climbers to engage both physically and mentally, navigating Yosemite’s distinctive granite personality while sharing space with the park’s resilient wildlife. It may not be an easy stroll up the face, but Eye Noir’s gritty, layered experience reveals a side of Yosemite sport climbing that rewards persistence and preparation in equal measure.