At the heart of Angeles National Forest, the Attack of the Clowns route carves a demanding path up Crystal Lake Wall’s rugged face. This single-pitch, 100-foot line begins by following an open book—mirroring the first pitch of the nearby Clown Syndrome split—as it pushes climbers through a gritty, moss-streaked crack system that reveals its sharp character with every move. The climb demands a steady hand, precise footwork, and a balanced mind; moss and lichen cling to the steep rock, making smearing a cautious lesson in trust and technique. From the approach, you’ll notice the crack's playful treachery: it first climbs moderate terrain (think 5.6-7) straight to a tree belay, then steps into steeper, more technical territory where the grade tightens into a 5.9+ with subtle but tricky protection placements.

Two distinct cruxes test your resolve. The first confronts you with a small roof on the right side about halfway up—an unexpected bulge that forces you to marshal power and finesse. Moving past this, the pitch eases briefly before you meet the second crux, where the angle lessens but the movements require smart foot placement and continued engagement. With its mix of clean moves and sections laced with dirt, small plants, and occasional loose rock, Attack of the Clowns delivers an authentic San Gabriel experience where protection often runs tight and demands well-chosen gear.

Many climbers break this route into two pitches to improve communication and safety, belaying at a small oak tree roughly halfway up. This makes for a more comfortable and controlled lead, especially if you’re warming up with this area’s demanding style or climbing with a less experienced partner. The anchor setup here, however, tends to be fiddly: expect to wrap slings around irregular features and supplement with an inverted #3 Camalot for security. Some locals have expressed the thought that a discreetly placed belay bolt would enhance safety without compromising the route’s natural feel.

Your gear focus is vital—small cams up to a #3 Camalot dominate, with offset nuts covering tricky placements in tight spots. The route’s varied protection spots require both patience and awareness, emphasizing thoughtful placement over rapid clipping, making it a solid test for climbers honing their trad game.

The approach to Crystal Lake Wall is straightforward but requires attentiveness; the trail meanders through shaded chaparral and pine, with some sandy patches and modest elevation gain—expect a 30-45 minute hike in moderate terrain before arriving at the base. The crisp air carries the scent of pine resin and warm earth, while distant calls of birds punctuate the quiet forest, setting an unhurried rhythm before you step into the vertical challenge ahead.

Timing your climb is key. The east-facing wall catches morning light but finds relief under shade come midday, making spring and fall ideal seasons when temperatures are moderate and the rock is less prone to overheating. Summer climbs are possible but prepare for early starts and carry ample water to beat the rising heat. Descending requires a rappel; the anchor’s complexity means double-checking each component before committing to the rappel—loose rock near the top and uneven ground at the base invite a mindful exit.

Attack of the Clowns is a route that speaks to climbers ready to embrace the raw San Gabriel style—technical, occasionally gritty, and demanding respect for both rock and exposure—but rewards those willing to invest focus and commitment with a memorable, character-filled ascent. It thrives on a blend of mental engagement and skill, asking you to read the line with patience and precision. Prepare well, focus on steady footwork, and bring your sharpest gear intuition for a rewarding day on this wilderness wall.